Overwhelmed by the Enormity of Minutiae

April 20, 2010

When I first thought about getting married, prior to actually getting engaged, I thought about the venue, I thought about the dress and I think that’s about it. I already had the guy, so that was a big piece of the puzzle figured out! But I don’t know that anyone ever tells you just how many decisions need to be made.

And yeah, when you really think about it there’s a lot more that goes into it. You need to pick out the menu and invitations and flowers. But even that is small beans.

I’m talking about the nitty-gritty, itty-bitty details like, will I have an aisle runner? What should go into my centerpieces and how can they coexist with any decoration from the ceiling we may have? How should I do my hair? How should my bridesmaids do their hair? Do I need a makeup artist? Do my bridesmaids need a makeup artist? Will I wear my glasses to the ceremony? Should there be a leaf theme throughout or is that too over the top?

I have 18 months to plan my wedding, and I have to be honest, I’m finding some of the details a bit overwhelming. I do, in fact, stay up at night thinking about random wedding details!

I think a big part of the problem is that even though most of these decisions will be decided with my fiance, he’s not going to remember that we need to register for everyday glasses and wine glasses and juice glasses. Paul’s a big picture kind of guy. He sees the whole wedding. I see the pieces of the puzzle.

And I suppose that’s probably the healthiest kind of relationship there is. We complement each other. But when I’m trying to decide whether our colors should be red and brown or red and orange or red, yellow and orange,  or can you do four colors? Having him say, “Shana, we’ll figure it out.” really isn’t helping as much as it should.

So, now that the venue is booked, there are details that I don’t have to worry about for at least six months, probably closer to a year from now. The best part about getting married in the Hudson Valley is that when your caterer says “Trust me.” you almost always do. That’s because our caterer and almost every other caterer in the area is trained at the Culinary Institute in Hyde Park. So when they tell you to trust them, it’s because they know what they’re doing. I’m looking forward to choosing a menu. Okay, if I’m being honest, I’m looking forward to eating a TON of really yummy food in hopes of narrowing dow a menu. The cake is part of our package and I believe is done by a bakery in Cold Spring, so we’ll get to go taste those too. And cake flavors shouldn’t be too hard. Cake decoration will though. Another detail to consider, do we need a cake topper??

Ultimately, the thing I need to keep reminding myself is to take it one step at a time. Stop freaking out about the little things, because I will figure them out. The next step is to find a dress and luckily, I have a pretty good idea of what I’m looking for there. I doubt it’ll be easy to find the right dress, but hopefully it will be fun.


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